WanderingAmylessly 2.0

The response to the quiz celebrating my 900th blog post was, to say the least, underwhelming. Thank you to the three kind souls who participated (or who just really wanted free stuff). I appreciated your effort! Here are the answers (based on some random Internet searches, so I'm not truly guaranteeing they're 100 percent legit)... 1. A -- The word HAMSTER comes from the german "hamstern" which means "to hoard." 2. C -- Oldest confirmed COCKATIEL was 35 3. True -- Recliners and hide-a-beds: most deadly to FERRETS. I've heard they eat panty hose and die, too. Not real bright, those critters. 4. B -- Yogurt doesn't seem to be dangerous to DOGS. 5. Myth -- A CAT uses its whiskers to stay in tune with its surroundings, but its sense of balance is not in its whiskers. 6. Rat -- There's a whole web site devoted to celebrities with RATS. I don't judge. I just report. 7. C -- GOLDFISH is still most popular aquarium fish. 8. D -- BOSTON TERRIER isn...

I thought last night's Oscars were plain old fun. Some very surprising moments that had me chuckling, contemplating, and in one case unceremoniously flipping off the TV screen. The Ben Stiller impression of weirded-out, hairy, gum-chomping Joaquin Phoenix was jaw-dropping hysterical. Made even more funny by his co-presenter Natalie Portman playing it deadpan straight and not even cracking a smile. At one point, she muttered something about him looking like he worked in a Hasidic meth lab and I totally lost it. I love musicals. I could've watched three hours of Hugh Jackman singing and dancing and been perfectly happy. I've read some reviews this morning that poked fun at the over-the-top dance numbers, but I liked them...especially the stuff with Beyonce. That woman has a set of pipes, a set of gams, and probably sets of other things best not to mention here. I'd rather watch that than the constant panning around to watch Brangelina sitting there looking sophisticated a...

UPDATE: Like this is any big surprise...I SUCK. On a positive note, I've learned a new skill tonight -- I learned how to do strikethrough in html. Give me an award... I could not stink worse at this. Of all the movies nominated, I've seen about THREE. But what the heck... Leading Actor -- Mickey Rourke But I'm OH-SO-GLAD Sean won!!! Supporting Actor -- Heath Ledger Leading Actress -- Melissa Leo But I'm glad Kate won! Supporting Actress -- Marisa Tomei Animated Feature -- Bolt Art Direction -- The Dark Knight Cinematography -- The Reader Costume Design -- Australia Best Picture -- Milk Short Film, Animated -- Lavatory, Lovestory Short Film, Live Action -- Auf der Strecke Visual Effects -- The Dark Knight Directing -- Slumdog Millionaire Documentary Feature -- The Garden Documentary Short -- Smile Pinki Film Editing -- The Dark Knight Foreign Language Film -- The Class Makeup -- Curious Case of Benjamin Button Original Score -- Defiance Original Song -- Jai Ho Sound Ed...

Let me preface this by saying that I took this information from the Internet, so I'm not going to vouch for its accuracy. And I'm not Alex Trebek, so I don't know the answer to everything and refuse to argue with you if you protest the correct responses. This is what it is: a silly little trivia quiz, designed to make you think, laugh, cheat, go "hmmm", and quite possibly win something for your pet. It won't be anything lavish, so don't go getting Fido's hopes up. (How am I doing with the minimizing of the importance of this thing I just spent an hour researching...) DON'T COMMENT with the answers. Instead, e-mail me your responses: amyschoon@hotmail.com. You have until 8 p.m. Tuesday. Then I'll tally up the answers and see who has the most correct. In the event of a tie, there could be a tiebreaker question, but most likely I'll be drawing names from a dog dish. The winner gets a $10 gift card/certificate to Petco or PetSmart -- your choic...

That last post, the one about loving your pets day, happened to be the 900th post since I started my blog in November 2004. So in honor, I'm going to have a little contest. Details to come. There'll be a prize in it for your favorite critter companion if you win.

I read in the paper that today, Friday, Feb. 20, has been designated as National Love Your Pets Day. Well, duh. I think you should hug and cuddle and play with and walk and groom and feed treats to your special furry or feathered or scaled or gilled or whatever'ed friends...EVERY DAY. But because we're lemmings (anyone have a lemming as a pet?) and we need a path to follow, I say make today an extra special day for your companion creatures. Even for ferrets and Chihuahuas and skinks and other such nuttiness. I can't wait to go home and snuggle my Westie, who I'd like to believe considers every day national love your owners day, too. Mostly she acts like every day is national worship the ground your Westie walks on day. Or perhaps national today's going to be the day I gut that rabbit and show Mom the innards day. Or even national leave your dirty socks and underwear on the floor so I can spend hours gnawing them to shreds day. I love dogs. Someday we might even get...

In celebration of this year's Presidents Day, C-SPAN gathered a cross-section of 65 presidential historians to rank the 42 former White House occupants on 10 "attributes of leadership." This second Historians Survey of Presidential Leadership puts Obama's idol Abe Lincoln at the top (as did the first, which was released in 2000), followed by Washington, FDR, Teddy Roosevelt, and Truman. Those attributes were: public persuasion, crisis leadership, economic management, moral authority, international relations, administrative skills, relations with Congress, vision/agenda setting, pursued equal justice for all, and performance within context of times. Bill Clinton ranked 15th, up 6 spots from the last survey. It seems that, over time, people have realized that -- compared with declaring war without cause, torturing prisoners, spying on innocent Americans, landing the country in its next Great Depression and so on -- fiddling around with the intern seems rather harmless a...

This day's a big deal for a 5-year-old boy who loves all things wheeled, whose favorite movie characters include a cocky red racer named Lightning McQueen, whose middle name should've been Speed instead of Theodore. Today is the official start to the 2009 NASCAR Sprint Cup season, with the running of the Daytona 500. Henry's been digging the coverage. He picked his favorite driver for the season: Jeff Gordon (in part because, according to H, his DuPont Chevy's "colors are so beautiful"). He jammed with Keith Urban during the pre-race concert. And he sat on the couch with a bowl of popcorn, asking occasionally when the big wrecks were going to hurry up and happen. But I'm wondering whether we should watch the remaining races of the season with the sound off. Because I heard two frightening things exit Henry's mouth, both a regurgitation of what he'd heard earlier in the broadcast. I'm not sure which was more disturbing. 1. Henry, as he was racin...

Easy Silence: This is one of my favorite love songs ever. It got caught up in the whole Bush/I'm embarrassed to be from Texas/Dixie Chicks debacle. Even though the song had significance to the Chicks because it was written as an explanation for their connection to each other -- I think it's an amazing love song. It sums up that safe, protected feeling you have when, in the midst of bad times, just being with your beloved is enough. Here are the lyrics: When the calls and conversations Accidents and accusations Messages and misperceptions Paralyze my mind Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving Burnin' fumes of gasoline and And everyone is running and I Come to find a refuge in the Easy silence that you make for me It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me And the peaceful quiet you create for me And the way you keep the world at bay for me The way you keep the world at bay Monkeys on the barricades Are warning us to back away They form commissions trying to find ...

I can't stand Valentine's Day. There's some sort of perverse irony there, the fact that I H-A-T-E a day that is supposed to be all about romance and passion and L-O-V-E. It's not the sentiment. I appreciate the idea of taking time out to give someone a hug or kiss or gift or chunk o' choco. But I don't like being forced into it by candy and floral and greeting card companies that all are trying desperately to make up for the lull created by penny-pinching post-Christmas consumers. For years, I hated VD (which is my twisted way of referring to the communicable day that catches like a bad case of warts and itches worse). Why did I hate it? Because nothing sucks more than watching every woman around you get massive bouquets of Telefreakingflora. All. Day. Long. When you aren't dating anyone. When you aren't even pretending to date anyone. The only event I might have hated more back then was New Year's Eve, standing around at a party watching everyone el...

Waah. Sadie the Scottie didn't win. But, next best thing...guess who did... A TEN-YEAR-OLD Sussex Spaniel named Stump! Tim and I decided, after seeing him win his group, that he was just about the cutest thing we'd ever seen. He's, by far, the oldest best in show in the 133-year history of the Westminster Kennel Club dog show. That whole old dog, new trick thing rears its furry, slobbery head. One curious thing I noticed about this year's best in show hopefuls: not one of the seven dogs in the final was light-colored or white. They were all either dark brown, gray, or shades of black. Is this some sort of subtle commentary on the dark days we're experiencing with our economy? Perhaps it's only a coincidence. Maybe it's the year for dogs of color, what with our new historic president and all. Maggie points out that the Westies never had a chance. There's always next year. Photo: David Atlas, msg.com

I am such a sucker for four-legged critters of the canine variety. Which makes this day like Christmas for me. Tonight is, of course, the final night of the Westminster Kennel Club dog show. There's an occasional froo-froo pooch, like the puffball Bichon Frise, or the array of poodles that look more like topiary than a beloved pet. But I'm sure to their owners and handlers, they're the most beautiful sight on Earth. And most of the dogs, whether big or small, long-haired or short, black or white or spotty-speckled glory...have my heart. Last night, dogs of several categories took the stage to compete for top spot in their particular group. Maggie (my Westie) and I paid particular attention to the terrier group, of course. Usually, it's dominated by the Norwich or Norfolk, the Sealyham or the Airedale. Once again, the West Highland White Terriers were shut out -- Tim thinks because they fluff up the fur too much and make the Westies look like marshmallows with legs. Very...

From the files of "I had no idea...how cool!" on my continuing UU journey: Susan B. Anthony was a Unitarian! Maybe I'm the only one who finds that interesting. At any rate, I share my new knowledge. I'd also like to share a song. It's a hymn we occasionally sing at UUSIC, most recently that I remember during our human rights/GLBT recognition service last year. It's called "Blue Boat Home," lyrics written by Peter Mayer. I think its music is based on a traditional Christian hymn (and I know that the Mormon church has its version which, I'm sure, has sucked all the joy right out of it), although I don't know the name. If you know it, feel free to share. "Blue Boat Home" may just be my all-time favorite church song. Mostly because it sounds a bit John Denver-ish, has the slightest syncopation that makes me tap my toe and sway in the pew, and while it has no mention of God or Jesus or Amen, strokes my soul. Here's a clip of the song...

Let's see, it's mid-February. It's 14 degrees outside. Someone of importance at my work last week called me, among other things I'm not going to get into here because I will cry, inefficient (even thought I've not missed a deadline in the five months I've worked here). I've been in my new job long enough to have the blinders ripped off me to see the misery of office politics rearing its head. I blew my diet. And so on. Looks like it's about time for "the spiral," or that period of time when I become some caricature of an anti-depressant advertisement. Do you feel sad, tired, increasingly emotional? Disinterested in the activities you usually enjoy? I'm taking my meds. I've seen my therapist twice in the last six days. I'm using my light box and exercising and making myself do those things I usually enjoy, even when I'd rather crawl under the covers and escape to oblivion. I'm trying to practice the skills I learned in grou...

What does it say that Ogden experienced a "renaissance" and turned into the latest Western hot spot...AFTER we left?! Read this story from USA Today about Northern Utah's ski resorts and about how we missed our chance to get in on the good stuff. We just had the gangs and the hookers, the drug deals and peeling paint and a downtown mall with no stores in it. And an overpriced, 100-year-old house that took a year to sell, at a loss, and sucker-punched our savings account. If it's any consolation to my fellow former Ogdenites, though, I hear Rooster's Brewpub went downhill. And the Mormons are still in town...not that there's anything wrong with that...I'm just sayin'...

I had an unsettling trip to the dentist today. No, I didn’t have any cavities. No, I didn’t get a root canal. Yes, the perky hygienist scolded me for not flossing enough, but that happens every time. My brush, so to speak, with the freaky came when Miss Perky told me it’d be a good idea for me to get some sort of PanoXSupersonicultradooper digital image of my head. I think I had one before, at a different dental office, and thought nothing of it. I agreed. Ok, fine. Then she went on to explain why I should get one of these X-ray shots. I’m quoting here: "It’s really important to have these kinds of X-rays because if you were ever to get in a horrible accident and needed reconstructive surgery, these are the pictures that could help you get your face back. OR, if you know, they ever needed to identify the body…" Well, it’s nice to know that in the future, when my cranium is mangled beyond recognition, or when the police are trying to piece together my identity from the 3,000 b...

I haven't blogged in a while, so I thought I'd make use of some copy I already wrote for my Facebook page and print it here, too. For those of you who are either 1) too technophobic for such nonsense or 2) haven't gotten into my good graces enough to be friended by me. There might be other excuses for you, but I don't have time to get into them now. Anyway, the schtick goes that you list 25 Random Things about yourself, then your readers are supposed to do the same about themselves and send the list back to you (and others they would like to harass and annoy and shock with their twisted form of online therapy). Happy Monday. That might be #26 -- I hate it when people tell me to have a good day. I hate telling people to have a good day. As if, having a choice, we'd opt to have a sucky one. Really. 1. I had an Internet romance before it became trendy. And I learned why you're never supposed to trust a complete stranger in cyberspace. Particularly one who insists h...