Honey, can you run an errand...

Breaking news from the Associated Press: Lottery officials say my husband is much more likely to become filthy rich than most of the rest of y'all.

DES MOINES (AP) - Feeling lucky? You might be if you're a Tim or a Kellie.

Those were the luckiest names for men and women playing Iowa Lottery games since the lottery started in 1985.

The lottery's acting CEO, Ken Brickman, says the agency did a records check to determine the names of people who won prizes of more than $100,000.

So should I change my name to further increase the odds? Nah. I'll spread the luck around, give someone else a chance.

But Tim, you'll need to make a stop on the way home. Those numbers from your last fortune cookie were 3 14 22 29 37. Make 'em count.

Comments

Brianne said…

Ken Brickman? Sounds like a Simpsons character...

Tell Tim to pick up LOTS of lottery tickets!!!

On the other hand, maybe this story was a tricky ruse by the Lottery people to give all the Tims and Kellies of the state false hope....

12:21 PM

Anonymous said…

This is strangely true. I have won the lottery three times, ranging from $125,000 to $23.3 Million\

Timothy Kelly

5:57 PM

Tim said…

I almost bought a ticket at the gas station on the way to work this morning. The prize was only about $15 million. Since it's obvious I'm going to win eventually, I want to win at least $50 million.

7:52 PM

Ho, Ho, Ho, How Many Times Can I Use "I'm too busy" as an Excuse?

I haven't had time to write. Work, swim meet volunteering, holiday decorating and shopping. But truthfully, I've not been in much of a mood to write anything anyway. Last night we put up the tree and Santa chachkies, and I drank my first egg nog of the season, so perhaps I'll be in a cheerier mood. Also, I have spent some time writing the annual Schoon holiday newsletter. If you happen to get a copy, treat it like a drinking game. Every time I make you roll your eyes, take a drink. Nog, wassail, Everclear. Whatever gets you through. One sure way to assist with merriment motivation is listening to Christmas carols. I'm not going to get into a debate over what truly constitutes a carol. You can "Jesus is the reason for the season" yourself until you turn blue; I generally lean toward the secular end of the holiday tune spectrum. And if you just gasped at my use of holiday instead of Christmas, go suck on a candy cane. It's my blog and my opinions. Deal. ...

IHATE IHOP Update

Tim went a few rounds, verbally, with the IHOP manager on Sunday and ended up getting our meal for half price. He still had to pay, though. I do not think that these people understand the severity of their incompetence. Or perhaps they just do not care. Someone commented to us that perhaps we should tell the IHOP folks what happened to the last restaurant that did us wrong. Recall the lactating masses who came out in support of us when we were booted from Hoover House restaurant in West Branch because I refused to breastfeed my baby in the bathroom? Remember the stories that ran in every newspaper and on every TV news show in the state -- and beyond? I'd like to point out that the Hoover House (which interestingly enough doubled as a venue for wet T-shirt contests on weekends) went out of business after our little incident. And for those of you who were befuddled and wondering how the police got involved on Sunday...someone from IHOP took the time to run out and write down our lice...

Who knew...

'Tis the season for bridal bliss. 'Tis also the season for the accompanying reception dance. And what's a wedding reception without that most unique of all marriage celebration dance numbers: The Chicken Dance. You know the drill. Polka starts, beak-quacking hand gestures, flapping, butt shimmying, and clapping ensue. A fun time is had by all (especially if there's an open bar). What you may not know is that: 1. This oom-pah song's origins rest with a Swiss according player named Werner Thomas who wrote it, most accounts say, in the 1950s. It originally was called the Duck Dance. 2. It is NOT German or Austrian, despite the images its roll-out-the-barrel-ish feelings it might conjure up. 3. A fellow named Norm Edlebeck, who was a bandleader from Wisconsin, introduced America to the Chicken Dance on TV's PM Magazine in 1982. 4. More than 140 versions of it have been recorded worldwide, including Walt Disney Records, together making more than 40,000,000 records (o...

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