If Rick Santorum becomes president, I will...

Become a vegan.
Join the ACLU.
Donate to Planned Parenthood.
Swear. A lot.
Actively support legalization of marijuana.
Faithfully watch Rachel Maddow.
Recycle obsessively.
Subscribe to The Advocate.
Listen to every Dan Savage podcast available.
Get a new piercing.
Vacation in Canada (if I can't move there).
Never drink tea -- party or not.
Carry this bag:

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