Hello January, you suck

Today is January 25, 2010. But it could've been any other winter day in the recent past. They seem to be drearily similar. That is...welcome to the downward spiral of post-Holiday, deepfreeze, lack-of-sunlight, life as someone with bipolar disorder -- heavy on the depression and much too light on the mania.

I've had a couple of stressors that smacked me around -- one having to do with my dismal failure at teaching Sunday school and the other related to my failed attempt to switch psychiatrists, ironically enough.

I stayed home sick today. My head hurts. My jaws throb what I'm assuming was all-night teeth clenching. Mostly I'm just pissed off that no matter how hard I try (I take my meds, I work out, I do good things for myself, I go to therapy, I try to communicate), before I know it, WHAM...here I am again.

Most people would think: geez, suck it up. People in Haiti are dying. People everywhere are dying. Or suffering. Or struggling. My problems are petty. Pathetic. Unimportant.

Mmmm. Now I feel so much better.