Oh why the hell not.

I make them every year. I break them every year. So does 99.9 percent of the rest of humankind who bothers. (And there are issues with verb tense/agreement in that last sentence, I fully acknowledge.)

I'm going to go ahead and make resolutions. But I'm going to call them short-term goals instead. We'll see how that works out for me. This will be my top 10 things to accomplish in 2010.

1. Pick one way to say our new year's name and stick with it. Is it "twenty ten" or is it "two thousand ten"? (It will never be...get this in your thick head Katie Couric, "two thousand AND ten." My ninth grade English teacher taught me well.)

2. Reach my weight-loss goal. As of two weeks ago, It was 27 more pounds. It's no doubt slightly higher than that now, after the holiday season's snickerdoodles, chocolates, egg nog, peppermint mochas, and the blueberry scone currently being shoveled into my mouth.

3. Do something outrageously fun for our 10th wedding anniversary. The traditional gift is tin or pewter. The modern is aluminum. The alternate modern is diamond. Tim could resolve to forgive me for losing my engagement/wedding rings 6 years ago and buy me something new! Or, we could plan an exciting getaway to beautiful Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, international headquarters for aluminum manufacturer ALCOA.

4. Run a half marathon. I said on my blog and Facebook earlier in 2009 that this would be a goal for summer 2010. Am I regretting this public declaration? Yup. I better get to reading the complete idiot's guide to running a half marathon...

5. Read 25 good books on my new Nook. Which is scheduled to transfer from the UPS man to my hot little hands on Tuesday.

6. Try really hard not to yell. It's my frustrated parent default mode. "Mommy I don't like it when you yell at me." "Henry, I don't like it when you don't LISTEN to me." That's about how it goes. Perhaps we'll both have things to work on this year.

7. Get through the spring semester teaching Sunday School and then NEVER teach it again. Mark my words -- the last part of this resolution will be all too easy to fulfill. What a nightmare. When the goal of each session is simply to "make sure the kids don't kill each other," something has gone horribly wrong.

8. Complete one knitting project a month. If I only knit socks or baby hats, I'll be ok. That blanket for the preemie project may eventually get done by the time the current group of NICU babies goes off to college.

9. Enjoy my 20 year high school reunion. If it kills me.

10. Learn to swim. I mean, really learn. I think I'll take some private lessons and work on proper stroke techniques. Swimming's an amazing way to exercise. And maybe next Christmas I'll ask Santa for a road bike and resolve to do a triathlon in 2011.

At some point, I'll really regret writing down #10.

Happy new year to all those in the blogosphere. Laugh. Love. Enjoy life. And if you'll keep reading, I'll keep writing. Consider that resolution 11.

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