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Happy holidays. Hold the happy.

Why is it that every year, about this time, when we pull out the camera and lighting kit and festive attire and reindeer antlers or other such accessories for our annual Christmas card picture, we end up stomping, yelling, growling, threatening to tell Santa about bad attitudes, popping antacids and longing for a couple eggnogs with rum -- hold the eggnog? Tis the season, my butt.

Perhaps next year we'll hire "extras" to pose for our greeting card photo. That way, when they squirm and whine and beg for candy and make sour faces and refuse to do a single thing asked of them, we can hate them and not feel guilty about it.

Plus, while we're creating this sugarplum fantasy, I'll be in charge of casting. I'd like you to meet the new me...Kate Winslet.

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