PEDAL FASTER!!!

It's defined as "a form of high-intensity exercise that involves using a stationary exercise bicycle in a classroom setting."

What it actually is: an hour of torturous, masochistic, somehow addictive form of physical exertion that includes pedaling while standing up on a bicycle and cranking the resistance to a point at which your legs begin to quiver and you feel distinctly as though you may a) pass out, b) cry, c) throw up, d) all of the above, not necessarily in that order. It also involves sweating so profusely, you could wring the Indian Ocean out of your jersey at the end of class. And of course, it is led by a tanned, toned, sickeningly adorable trainer (coincidentally named Amy) who remains perky throughout the class, telling witty stories and joking with the regulars (while the rest of the class struggles to pull oxygen into our searing, breathless lungs).

It's called Spinning, and I always thought the people who did these classes must be insane. I still think that. But now I'm one of them. It's an incredible workout. Not only for your body, but for your mind. Because there's always that part of my brain plotting what heavy object I'd like to heave at the instructor. I've become quite creative.

There's a guy in the class each Friday who has lost 200 pounds. He's quite an inspiration at the gym. He's sort of our fitness club's "Jared the Subway Guy." I figure, if this wacko class can help him lose that much weight, it must have some effect beyond making one's legs turn to Jell-O, before collapsing in a wasted heap.

SPIN. It's the latest four-letter word in my vocabulary.