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My Name Is...

Be careful what you name your kids.
And watch out what you let them read.
A name is a powerful weapon, to be used for good or evil. Or for literary effect.

We chose Henry because it’s a classic, very traditional without a hint of fad. Same with his middle name, Theodore. A kid named Henry Theodore could grow up to be a president. Or a renowned physicist. Or a miracle-working neurosurgeon.

Once we had him and named him, we found out that several children’s book and show characters share his name. A big strong coal-powered engine named Henry makes frequent appearances with Thomas the Tank Engine. A bear named Henry has a series of books about his life in the area in and around Walden Pond, all based on the life of literary great Henry David Thoreau. Another cuddly bear named Theodore tells tales of his life with a little girl named Lucy in one of our favorite bedtime books.

We’re quite pleased with the representations.

It could be so very much worse, as we realized on Saturday when we were at the library for storytime and heard a daddy call to his child, “Walter, come here.”

First off, Walter is a name for a bald man with dentures in a retirement home. Second, this poor toddler shares his name with the star of a series of books about a farting dog. Something about naming your kid Walter borders on child abuse. Then again, so might naming your girl Emma, knowing that she is destined to be one of 15 Emmas in her kindergarten class.

This name thing can be tricky. It’s fun for kids to see and hear their name in a book or show, depending on the context. Because we’re up to our eyeballs in potty talk right now, we’ve been reading about a kid named Joshua who does his business in what the author claims in a potty but looks more like a giant flowerpot. I’ve known a couple Josh’es who are sh**heads. Therefore, I will never think of the name Joshua in quite the same way.

It’s also worth a chuckle to hear my son recite page for page from the book Uh Oh, Gotta Go, by the guy who played Bob on Sesame Street. Especially when the names of the children in the book are names of grown-ups in our lives. For example, “Mark picks a potty.” “Amanda goes by the book,” “The last thing Kerry does before she goes to bed is use the potty,” and “Tom loves everybody’s bathroom.”

I guess names in children’s books are harmless and fun. The real excitement comes with names in music. H has one of those, too. The day I gave birth, I noted that he was born on the 8th, then promptly began singing, “I’m Henry on the 8th I am, Henry on the 8th I am I am” in the spirit of the Herman’s Hermits classic. Quite catchy. Quite dreadful, I’m sure he’ll think when he’s old enough to realize.

I’d say he should be thankful we didn’t name him Herman.

Comments

Brianne said…
I, for one, am glad my name is rare enough that I didn't have five other "Briannes" in my classes growing up. Although I was mixed up with a bad-seed "Briana" in high school a few times. She was a trouble maker. The ONE PERSON I got mixed up with.

Henry Theodore is such a frickin' CUTE name, too. When I tell people his name they just melt into "aahhhhs."
FletcherDodge said…
I'll never forgive my parents for naming me Throatwobler Mangrove.

(Monty Python anyone? Anyone?)

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