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Corporate Crap

Shoot me in the head.
Please.
I can't take it anymore.

In a late-afternoon meeting (which no one should call, by the way), I heard the following corporatespeak:

Leveraging
Branding
Operational Excellence
Marketplace
Solutions
Benchmarking
Processing Elements
Empowerment

I may have blogged about this buzzword hell before. Today was an all-time low to which my colleagues have sunk. I wish I'd had one of THESE to keep me occupied. I'm living in a Dilbert cartoon. Only without the humor.

Comments

FletcherDodge said…
It sounds like you need to redefine your positioning to take advantage of approaching paradigm shifts and better target your key stakeholders.
7:41 PM
Amy said…
Holy hell. Were you hiding under the conference table?! At any rate, I'm so so so glad it's Friday.
7:55 PM
Brianne said…
Oh yes. One of my bosses is so bad at that. His favorite phrases are "laundry list of services" and "bending the needle." He is an L 7 weenie.

He is really the only person who speaks (and writes.. good god I hate proofing stuff he writes) like that around these parts. Then again, there are only four other people in this entire office.
7:00 AM
Anonymous said…
Meetings are a good time to meditate and practice patience. Or you can just let out a big belch in the middle of the meeting and you will feel amazingly refreshed. =)
10:28 AM
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