Skip to main content

I can't deal

I'm not quite sure how I will get through tomorrow. Many others feel the same way. So the following is a list of lovely liberal tasks to do as an alternative to watching the horror that is Dubya's second inauguration. (At least it will be his last.)

1. Plant a tree.
2. Join the Sierra Club.
3. Enjoy an alcoholic beverage. Or two.
4. Watch Fahrenheit 9-11.
5. Invite Michael Moore over to watch.
6. Read. Anything.
7. Donate to the Democratic Party.
8. Denounce the war.
9. Start a countdown calendar to 2008.
10. Have some hedonistic sex.
11. Visit Canada.
12. Speak French.
13. Give peace a chance.
14. Speak with absolutely no hint of a drawl.
15. Read Bill Clinton's book.
16. Write a letter to a legislator.
17. Participate in a spelling bee.
18. Volunteer for President Carter's Habitat for Humanity.
19. Praise stem-cell researchers.
20. Vacation in a blue state.
21. Celebrate women's choice today.
22. Be tolerant.
23. Listen to Air America Radio.
24. Buy a "Don't blame me, I didn't vote for him" t-shirt.
25. Watch reruns of The West Wing.
26. Avoid committing human rights violations.
27. Hug a friend who's still out of work.
28. Be honest.
29. Try to figure out the difference between code yellow and code orange.
30. Lean to the left.
31. Sing along to the Dixie Chicks.
32. Put a few extra dollars in savings...you'll need it at retirement.
33. Apologize to any non-Americans you know.
34. Brush up on the rules for impeachment.
35. Buy a "The President Quayle we never had" bumper sticker.
36. Say "nu-clee-ar" over and over and over...
37. Attend a MENSA meeting.
38. Take your "alternative lifestyle" friends out for lunch.
39. Give a hoot, don't pollute.
40. Remember the good ol' days with Monica Lewinsky.
41. Buy the twins a couple rounds of margaritas.
42. Cry. You're entitled.
43. Sleep until tomorrow.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Wow. I hope you're much better now. That's kind of an extreme reaction to something with so little ultimate meaning.

No matter how great (or ungreat) you are, ultimately, NOTHING you do can change the fate of the universe (but everything you do will bring the universe closer to it's fate :).

Hamlet himself, the author of Shakspeare (the box office hit) once said, 'Ya know, Caesar himself could be this brick in my wall...' (well something like that; I don't remember the exact wording).

Whether the universe decides to collapse into a spec of ultra extremely gigantically ludicrously dense material, or spill out over the voids until the last solid body (and brain) evaporates into nothingness, you will be able to do exactly nothing, no matter how great a president we have.

Popular posts from this blog

Is it OK to own a Canadian?

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a U.S. resident, and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative: Dear Dr. Laura: Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them. 1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexic...

In memoriam...

I remember the first time I heard the name "Les Anderson." A bunch of Wichita State University communication majors were sitting around on campus, talking about classes they planned to take. Several people warned me: watch out for Les Anderson. He was tough. He had a murderous grading scale. It was nearly impossible to get an A. They weren't kidding. But he wasn't tough just to be a tyrant. From his teaching sprang a fleet of incredible, successful journalists, writers, editors, broadcasters, public relations experts, advertisers, non-profit professionals...I could go on and on. Most importantly, he created a legion of people who wanted to make a difference in the world. The greatest gift Les gave to them all? He believed in them, cared about them for their own personal stories as well as the stories they told for class assignments or in the pages of his hometown newspaper. Les was my teacher. My boss. My mentor. My conscience. My champion. My friend. When I started c...

Holy Separated-At-Birth, Batman!

Gary Oldman...meet Uncle Knit-Knots from Imagination Movers.