Skip to main content

It's all fun and games until...


Friends of ours recently gave our son a toy -- the Fisher-Price Little People castle and woodsman's house, complete with Little People in the form of, conveniently enough, royalty and the woodsman. We're calling the royal man and woman King Theo and Queen Anne, after the couple who bought the set (and the dragon's been dubbed Harry, after the couple's Welsh Corgi). They're not altogether fond of children, but they've taken a liking to our little squirt, possibly because he gives them quirky lines to quote. For example: the time when my sweet little one was at the store with my husband, who asked "What did Daddy forget?" And H said, all sweet and innocent, "Daddy needs beer." It's true. I was in the loony bin, he was all alone, and he, indeed, could've used an alcoholic beverage.

So H loves this castle. He gets the names mixed up and they become King Anne and Queen Theo, and he often flings Theo from the catapult. We didn't put the batteries in, so instead, every time the drawbridge flings open and the royal seat maneuvers onto the balcony to greet subjects, we trumpet "doo do doo-doo" with great enthusiasm.

Scary thing is, Mommy and Daddy like this toy, too. A little too much, perhaps. We've developed an adult storyline, in which the queen is sneaking around the king's back to have a torrid affair with the woodsman. We also added several other Little People from H's Fisher-Price school bus. So the king and queen suddenly have a blonde daughter and a redhead daughter -- neither one looking anything like her mom or dad. And interestingly, a little boy now lives with the woodsman as his son, of course, having been the love child of the queen and woodsman.

And if you think that's a little twisted, you should see what we can do with Lincoln Logs and a Thomas the Tank Engine train set.

Comments

FletcherDodge said…
I can't wait to see the animated video you do with the Little People soap opera. Let me know when you get it up on YouTube.
Brianne said…
You work with what you've got. :) And everyone needs beer!

Popular posts from this blog

Ho, Ho, Ho, How Many Times Can I Use "I'm too busy" as an Excuse?

I haven't had time to write. Work, swim meet volunteering, holiday decorating and shopping. But truthfully, I've not been in much of a mood to write anything anyway. Last night we put up the tree and Santa chachkies, and I drank my first egg nog of the season, so perhaps I'll be in a cheerier mood. Also, I have spent some time writing the annual Schoon holiday newsletter. If you happen to get a copy, treat it like a drinking game. Every time I make you roll your eyes, take a drink. Nog, wassail, Everclear. Whatever gets you through. One sure way to assist with merriment motivation is listening to Christmas carols. I'm not going to get into a debate over what truly constitutes a carol. You can "Jesus is the reason for the season" yourself until you turn blue; I generally lean toward the secular end of the holiday tune spectrum. And if you just gasped at my use of holiday instead of Christmas, go suck on a candy cane. It's my blog and my opinions. Deal. ...

Who knew...

'Tis the season for bridal bliss. 'Tis also the season for the accompanying reception dance. And what's a wedding reception without that most unique of all marriage celebration dance numbers: The Chicken Dance. You know the drill. Polka starts, beak-quacking hand gestures, flapping, butt shimmying, and clapping ensue. A fun time is had by all (especially if there's an open bar). What you may not know is that: 1. This oom-pah song's origins rest with a Swiss according player named Werner Thomas who wrote it, most accounts say, in the 1950s. It originally was called the Duck Dance. 2. It is NOT German or Austrian, despite the images its roll-out-the-barrel-ish feelings it might conjure up. 3. A fellow named Norm Edlebeck, who was a bandleader from Wisconsin, introduced America to the Chicken Dance on TV's PM Magazine in 1982. 4. More than 140 versions of it have been recorded worldwide, including Walt Disney Records, together making more than 40,000,000 records (o...

IHATE IHOP Update

Tim went a few rounds, verbally, with the IHOP manager on Sunday and ended up getting our meal for half price. He still had to pay, though. I do not think that these people understand the severity of their incompetence. Or perhaps they just do not care. Someone commented to us that perhaps we should tell the IHOP folks what happened to the last restaurant that did us wrong. Recall the lactating masses who came out in support of us when we were booted from Hoover House restaurant in West Branch because I refused to breastfeed my baby in the bathroom? Remember the stories that ran in every newspaper and on every TV news show in the state -- and beyond? I'd like to point out that the Hoover House (which interestingly enough doubled as a venue for wet T-shirt contests on weekends) went out of business after our little incident. And for those of you who were befuddled and wondering how the police got involved on Sunday...someone from IHOP took the time to run out and write down our lice...